I just called the police

General talk. News, religion, politics, your daily life, whatever, it goes here. Just keep it clean.
User avatar
GhaleonOne
Ghost From The Past
Posts: 9071
Joined: Wed Dec 25, 2002 4:59 am
Location: Not of this world...
Contact:

I just called the police

Postby GhaleonOne » Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:09 am

I was at WalMart, and came out to my car only to hear some guy screaming at the top of his lungs. Really verbal abuse. The kid was walking too slow and was crying. It wasn't one of those "I didn't get my toy" cry, but a "I'm scared shitless" cry. I sat and waited to see if the guy would beat the kid or anything, but the only thing he did was yell at the kid for not being fast enough then grab the kid and spank him 3-4 times. He yelled at the kid some more before making him get in the car. An old couple drove up and parked next to him though, and he stopped yelling until they walked in. Then he kind of yelled at the kid some, and I drove around to get his liscense tag before he took off. I don't have a cell, so I had to wait until I got home to call, and apparently if they police don't see it, they can't do much, and I think the police were miffed at me for not calling immediately, but if I walked in the store, he would have been gone and I wouldn't have gotten a liscense tag out of it. Plus, had he gotten violent with the kid, I wanted to be able to get out and stop him. If I went inside (especially when I was like clear at the end fo the parking lot) it would have taken 10 minutes just to wade through all the people to get someone to call the police. He was leaving, so that would have been pointless. Getting his tag was better, so that at least they could identify him.

Either way, hopefully something is done, and they at least check it out, but wow. It does make me want to be a little more active in children's rights/charities/ministries. It really got to me though, when I left and thought about children like that who have abusive parents. It's just really sad...
-G1

User avatar
lnrSaxon
Red Dragon Priest
Posts: 126
Joined: Fri Dec 27, 2002 8:58 am
Location: between a sword and a battle axe
Contact:

Postby lnrSaxon » Sat Dec 24, 2005 1:27 am

I'm glad you did that. There have been times when I've pretty much wanted to report it, but I was either watching from far away or really couldn't do a whole lot. I'm glad you took action. =) My mentor just got her masters in psychology and has been working with trauma victims as a counselor, mostly for women and children. I'm glad there are people in the world who get involved with that. I know I'm not strong enough.

Anywhoo, yeah....... you rock. =)

Take care!

User avatar
Blue_Sycro
Red Dragon Priest
Posts: 155
Joined: Mon Apr 11, 2005 12:13 am
Location: Never too far!

Postby Blue_Sycro » Sat Dec 24, 2005 1:34 am

Yeah, that was a good move. Unfortunately, most people wouldn't have done anything. If someone's yelling that insanely at a kid, it could easily escalate to something way worse.

Hopefully the rest of the holidays will be peaceful for you :)

User avatar
GhaleonOne
Ghost From The Past
Posts: 9071
Joined: Wed Dec 25, 2002 4:59 am
Location: Not of this world...
Contact:

Postby GhaleonOne » Sat Dec 24, 2005 1:41 am

My guess is if a parent verbally abuses a child that bad, there's likely physical abuse in private.
-G1

User avatar
PrettyGirlJean
White Dragon Knight
Posts: 781
Joined: Thu Jun 23, 2005 4:20 am
Location: Amherst, NY
Contact:

Postby PrettyGirlJean » Sat Dec 24, 2005 1:43 am

Wow... that is really awesome of you to do that. I wish I could do the same. The neigbors kids next door are home for hours on end quite a lot while their mother is at work and I think the little boy abuses the little girl. I called their mother at work the other day (when it got to the point they were screaming bloody murder) and she said she would be home 20 minutes later to take care of it... I don't know if she did because I had to leave... but the little boy was cussing at the little girl and it sounded like she was trying to hide from him in her room because he hit her and he wouldn't let her be. I really want to call child services, but then maybe doing that will make their lives far worse and that's something I don't want to be responsible for. I feel so torn... I wish I could make just take action like you Ghal!

User avatar
GhaleonOne
Ghost From The Past
Posts: 9071
Joined: Wed Dec 25, 2002 4:59 am
Location: Not of this world...
Contact:

Postby GhaleonOne » Sat Dec 24, 2005 2:14 am

See, that kinda makes me torn too. If you call child services, and they take the child(ren) away from the parents, is the foster care they get going to be any better? I've heard horror stories of how children are treated in foster care, and even by the adopting parents. But I guess that's a chance you have to take. It all boils down to some people just shouldn't have kids if they're not willing to accept the responsibility.

BTW, I hope this thread didn't make me sound like I was looking for credit for this. I posted it mainly because I actually was concerned and wanted to vent. In fact, I feel pretty bad I didn't call it in quicker.
-G1

User avatar
Blue_Sycro
Red Dragon Priest
Posts: 155
Joined: Mon Apr 11, 2005 12:13 am
Location: Never too far!

Postby Blue_Sycro » Sat Dec 24, 2005 2:21 am

BTW, I hope this thread didn't make me sound like I was looking for credit for this. I posted it mainly because I actually was concerned and wanted to vent. In fact, I feel pretty bad I didn't call it in quicker.


Well I didn't get that feeling at all from you. If something like that just happened to me, I'd wanna tell someone too. And hey, at least you called it in eventually. Way better than doing nothing at all.

User avatar
PrettyGirlJean
White Dragon Knight
Posts: 781
Joined: Thu Jun 23, 2005 4:20 am
Location: Amherst, NY
Contact:

Postby PrettyGirlJean » Sat Dec 24, 2005 3:13 am

I didn't get that feeling either. I just felt compelled to express the frustration of my situation.

User avatar
Wolfman_Samurai
Red Dragon Priest
Posts: 222
Joined: Sun Mar 14, 2004 6:10 am
Location: Tampa FL

Postby Wolfman_Samurai » Sat Dec 24, 2005 3:50 am

Yeah honestly sometimes you just have to vent/talk/post about something if it is really bugging you. It sounded a little fishy to begin with. I work in a grocery store deli/bakery and i see at lot of kids crying because the parents won't get the kids a cookie. The decent parents give a firm, no then go to a stern no, then of course the really stern no, and of course the "no dessert tonight" threat. They don't care that I'm a foot away whatching this. The ones to watch out for are the ones that do nothing until they think noone is looking, then hit or smack their child. My mother only smacked me around twice once when I was 7 and other when I was 12 and i really needed to be hit for the things I did. The point I'm trying to make is that hitting your kid never solves anything. Espeacialy when they don't understand why they are being hit.


So.... good call G1.
Image

User avatar
localflick
Black Dragon Wizard
Posts: 495
Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2005 7:07 pm
Location: Chicago-ish
Contact:

Postby localflick » Sat Dec 24, 2005 6:16 am

I don't have a cell, so I had to wait until I got home to call, and apparently if they police don't see it, they can't do much


That's the worst part about witnessing something like this, you do what you can to help the situation, knowing that when you pass the responsibility for action along to the police they can't do much. It would be really cool if you had a camera cellphone, then you could get proof, and a photo of the license too. But these things happen, and you have to deal with what you have. It is very cool that you did something though. There are too many people who witness things like this and just ignore it, or think "it's not my problem." Way to take action and set an example. I wish there were more people willing to step in like that.

drumlord
Black Dragon Wizard
Posts: 354
Joined: Thu Dec 26, 2002 1:12 am
Location: RI

Re: I just called the police

Postby drumlord » Sat Dec 24, 2005 2:11 pm

GhaleonOne wrote:I was at WalMart


That's where your problems started ;)

Seriously though, all Wal-Marts have cameras in their parking lots for spying on their employees (no really). If the police are serious, they'll ask Wal-Mart for copies of the security tapes.
-Rich-

User avatar
GhaleonOne
Ghost From The Past
Posts: 9071
Joined: Wed Dec 25, 2002 4:59 am
Location: Not of this world...
Contact:

Postby GhaleonOne » Sat Dec 24, 2005 4:00 pm

Good point. But this was clear out at the end of the parking lot, considering how jam packed it was. Plus, being that it was more verbal abuse, it's not going to show anything but the kid getting spanked 3-4 times.
-G1

User avatar
LuciaOne
Goddess
Posts: 784
Joined: Wed Dec 25, 2002 5:43 pm
Location: Arctic north...
Contact:

Postby LuciaOne » Sun Dec 25, 2005 4:00 am

Aw G1 you're so sweet for doing that... most people would just ignore it ... God I hope something is done..
I found my old siggie! MUAH HAHAHAHAHA!!!
~~~
Sir Kizyr: ::high-pitched voice:: Ohh lookit me, I'm a cute li'l elf!
MiaAusa: Oh wait! NO I GET IT.
MiaAusa: It's him finally fessing up the the fact that HE IS a cut li'l elf. :d
MiaAusa: Hey, chance" NO I GET IT" to "NOW I GET IT"
MiaAusa: change**
MiaAusa: I'm mad with grammar today
MiaAusa: bad**

I'm mad with grammar too.
~~~
Sir Kizyr: Here's a lovely song about my favorite food
Sir Kizyr: Lima, lento, soy, and pinto ~ Navy, northern, and garbanzo! ~ Kidneys and frijoles negros
Sir Kizyr: I love beans, I love beans, woo woo woo! ~ How 'bout you? ~ High in fiber ~ Low in fat ~ Hey, I betcha didn't know that
Sir Kizyr: When I eat beans, I sit in my little cloud, I don't know why ~ maybe 'cause I'm cuttin' muffins ~~ Because....
Sir Kizyr: I love beans! Hey hey hey! ~ I love beans everyday! ~ Beans are an excellent source of protein ~ I love beans!
Sir Kizyr: Diggydoo!
~~~

User avatar
Ozone
Dragonmaster
Posts: 3039
Joined: Wed Dec 25, 2002 2:06 pm
Location: .above.the.weeping.world.
Contact:

Postby Ozone » Sun Dec 25, 2005 5:31 am

Here's to hoping that something is done :( Good call, G1. Get a damned cell phone --;
"'There are no atheists in foxholes' isn't an argument against atheism, it's an argument against foxholes." - James Morrow
"I'll hit your head with the thunder clap, you're seeing Horus"

User avatar
Maru
Bromide Hunter
Posts: 1698
Joined: Thu Dec 26, 2002 3:13 am
Location: Killadelphia, PA
Contact:

Postby Maru » Sun Dec 25, 2005 7:10 am

Ozone wrote:Here's to hoping that something is done :( Good call, G1. Get a damned cell phone --;

Seriously, yo. This is the 21st century!

Like everyone before me, I gotta say you had good judgement on that. Unfortunately, I don't think it's illegal to "discipline" your children in public. I heard something about the legality of it awhile ago, but I can't for the life of me remember what it was. The tapes, if the police ask for them, probably won't have the sound on it. Hopefully the childn's expression will say enough.

It's so sad, especially at this time of year, how awful some parents are to their children. We've all had our parental issues, but verbal and physical abuse? That just makes me sick.

User avatar
Kobalt
Lann Fisherman
Posts: 24
Joined: Sun Dec 18, 2005 7:47 pm
Location: Philadelphia

Postby Kobalt » Mon Dec 26, 2005 5:39 am

You made the right choice by reporting the incident. As stated before, most people would have just ignored it, like one crime that took place in Philadelphia a year ago where a woman was beaten to death by a man in broad daylight near a super market in center city. A croud of people just stood there and watched as this poor woman was dying on the street. Sorry I went on a morbid tangent but the point is that you did the right thing for reacting. I only wish that there were more people like you.
No one can know the path that I walk.

User avatar
DaWrestla
Red Dragon Priest
Posts: 146
Joined: Mon Oct 03, 2005 8:05 pm
Location: NJ
Contact:

Postby DaWrestla » Tue Dec 27, 2005 3:03 pm

G1, I'm gonna say this not knowing exactly how you define "abuse". So, having said that, I'm going to say that I think what you did was abhorent.

Parents have the right to discipline their children, even if that involves physical or verbal discipline. Children, on the other hand, do not have as many rights as adults...because they're children. If the parent was just yelling at his kid, and then felt the need to smack him once or twice, that's fine, and it's none of your (or anyone else's) business. The parent did nothing wrong.

If the parent was verbally abusing his kid (like calling him/her some pretty bad things), and physically absuing his kid (like punching him/her), then maybe you did the right thing.

However, I think it's a shame that we now live in a society that your neighbor deems it necessary to "tattle" on you. More people need to mind their own business.

I'm sure my position is not popular on this board....oh well.
Vaporized before my eyes

User avatar
PrettyGirlJean
White Dragon Knight
Posts: 781
Joined: Thu Jun 23, 2005 4:20 am
Location: Amherst, NY
Contact:

Postby PrettyGirlJean » Tue Dec 27, 2005 4:53 pm

DaWrestla wrote:G1, I'm gonna say this not knowing exactly how you define "abuse". So, having said that, I'm going to say that I think what you did was abhorent.

Parents have the right to discipline their children, even if that involves physical or verbal discipline. Children, on the other hand, do not have as many rights as adults...because they're children. If the parent was just yelling at his kid, and then felt the need to smack him once or twice, that's fine, and it's none of your (or anyone else's) business. The parent did nothing wrong.

If the parent was verbally abusing his kid (like calling him/her some pretty bad things), and physically absuing his kid (like punching him/her), then maybe you did the right thing.

However, I think it's a shame that we now live in a society that your neighbor deems it necessary to "tattle" on you. More people need to mind their own business.

I'm sure my position is not popular on this board....oh well.


I agree with some of what you are saying, that parents have the right to verbally and in some cases physically discipline their children. But I don't think Ghaleon was saying the parent didn't have that right. People should mind their own business, and this is just my opinion of course, if the person they are looking at is in the privacy of their own home. Discipling your child in public, makes it public. Now I agree that people should probably mind their own business, but if it's leaning more towards abuse than discipling and you're doing this in public, then I think an onlooker can call someone who has the authority to make it their business. I wouldn't have necessarily agreed with Ghaleon confronting the parent though. It's probably better to be safe than sorry to report what he saw. Nothing will come of what Ghal did if nothing is wrong anyhow.

And I think that Ghaleon expressed pretty clearly when saying:

"...hear some guy screaming at the top of his lungs. Really verbal abuse. The kid was walking too slow and was crying. It wasn't one of those "I didn't get my toy" cry, but a "I'm scared shitless" cry..."

...that this person was abusing their kid. Emotional scars are in some cases much worse than physical ones. I can not think of a good reason for that guy to be yelling at the top of his lungs (or even to smack a child. I am highly against smacking a child, spanking I believe is completely fine). That's only going to scare the child, and you can put the parental fear into a child with out making their ears bleed. I'm not saying have them "use their inside voice" (parent or child), I think that's a bunch of bull that doesn't work, but if the child knows you mean what you say, that you'll enforce, you don't have to scream.

Of course, as you say we can't know exactly what Ghaleon's definition of abuse and discipline are. I think everyone's is going to be somewhat different so perhaps discussing the definition is moot.

User avatar
DaWrestla
Red Dragon Priest
Posts: 146
Joined: Mon Oct 03, 2005 8:05 pm
Location: NJ
Contact:

Postby DaWrestla » Tue Dec 27, 2005 5:45 pm

Discipling your child in public, makes it public


I know what you mean. However, even though the discipline may be public, the child is not. Which is why I still feel people should mind their own business. If, and this may have been the case with G1's scenario, really loud yelling constitutes "disturbing the peace", then it might become everyone's business.


And I think that Ghaleon expressed pretty clearly when saying:

"...hear some guy screaming at the top of his lungs. Really verbal abuse. The kid was walking too slow and was crying. It wasn't one of those "I didn't get my toy" cry, but a "I'm scared shitless" cry..."

...that this person was abusing their kid


I disagree. Screaming at a child at the top of one's lungs alone is not abuse, it's what you say to them. And the "I'm scared shitless" cry, while genuine, doesn't mean abuse, either. Heh, when my mom pulled out the wooden spoon, you better believed I was scared shitless...it wasn't abuse, though.

(or even to smack a child. I am highly against smacking a child, spanking I believe is completely fine


I honestly don't know what the difference between smacking and spanking is. I always considered them the same (open hand).

You said you couldn't think of a good reason why the gentleman could yell at the top of his lungs. That's a good point, because neither of us was there to witness it, so that makes it tough to discuss. G1 was there, but (for me) G1 didn't go into enough detail.
Vaporized before my eyes

User avatar
GhaleonOne
Ghost From The Past
Posts: 9071
Joined: Wed Dec 25, 2002 4:59 am
Location: Not of this world...
Contact:

Postby GhaleonOne » Tue Dec 27, 2005 5:52 pm

DaWrestla's post


Agreed on most points, but this wasn't a case of discipline at all. In fact, I don't find spanking a child to be wrong, but there's a point where you draw the line. This was some very harsh verbal abuse, and the guy was definately giving off a vibe of abuse, rather than discipline. This was most certainly not discipline. You don't scream at the top of your lungs in a parking lot "Hurry the -Fatal Hopper- up goddamn it" over and over at a child, then race over and paddle your kid. I would not turn someone in for disciplining their child by spanking. I turned this guy in because of the verbal abuse he was giving his child. The spanking, given out of harsh anger isn't right either, but the reason I decided to call it in was the verbal abuse. This guy was putting out a vibe that I've seen before in people like my grandfather who can go into fits of rage over the smallest of things. I guess you just had to be there to understand what I'm saying. You can tell from the vibe a person is putting off, and this guy was giving a very abusive vibe. He kept looking around to see if anyone was watching, and when anyone got close, he'd stop.
-G1


Return to “Almost Anything Goes Board”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 26 guests