Teen parents.

[meg]

the more i read from you, aaron, the more i'm convinced that you just read whatever you want into whatever words happen pass your way. how exactly does "bored and miserable" translate into "a good life"? and, spared what exactly? teen pregnancy? are you inferring that all paths besides "good girl" lead to ... teen pregnancy? false dichotomy much?

[Aaron]

Well then explain why your life was so boring and miserable as a teenager?

I guess you never saw any movies. I guess you didn't have any friends? I guess you didn't buy new things?

Your privilege is showing. (God I hate that line). But it just went so well here.

I'm not assuming that only good girls don't get pregnant. You are. I know plenty of women who didn't have kids but dropped out of college to be stay at home girlfriends to their High School boyfriends. What a waste of life. I also know people who were consumed (literally) by their drug addictions into a near child like state.

I'm saying that you were spared that horrible horrible way of life.

[meg]

doom and gloom, while not teen pregnancy, still falls under false dichotomy. there's lots of different ways to live. and all the kids i know were raised fully cognizant of their choices, instead of shut up and sheltered or lied to have done just fine. the thing is, people are so scared of hurting little billy or susie with the cruelty of reality that they raise them to be ignorant instead of responsible.

and you only hate the privilege line because it's true and it stung.

___________

regarding being a teen:
i have attempted to write this several different ways, and they are all messy and depressing, and when i reread it, i am embarrassed, and kind of struck by how my life seems to resemble an avalanche more than anything. the best parts of my childhood were the parts where i locked myself into my own little world and pretended the rest wasn't there. i was poor; i did not buy things. we lived in ghettos or rural areas where i was not allowed to play with the other kids or vanish for more than a half hour at a time because my mother was convinced my alcoholic father would steal me. my brother had all kinds of health/mental problems--i seemed angelic/healthy by comparison, so i was largely left to my own devices. when he finally seemed to recover, my mother's body broke down on her (5 back surgeries, one neck surgery), and she spent 10 years bedridden, with 30 different doctors unable to figure out what was going on.

my first childhood friend, at 4 years old? was raped by her father the same year. the poor girl kinda lost it and started lashing out at everything, and my mother had to sit me down and explain rape to me so i would forgive my friend.

it's just kind of all... a mess. and not even my mess. everyone else's messes, that i had no power to in any way effect, that i pretty much just had to watch. that was growing up.

[Nobiyuki77]

why can't teens just practice self control? Whats so bad with that?

It's not that they can't. It's just they won't. Kids are kids, and kids are bound to do not-so-smart things in the heat of the moment. Kids become adults by learning from the mistakes they make as kids.

Also, the more your ban something from a kid's life, the more they want to try it for themselves. See smoking, alcohol, drugs, and sex.

[Benevolent_Ghaleon]

I'm glad you made that last post. A previous one seemed to imply that you feel frustrated that you didn't get boned a lot as a teen. lol

Seriously. The only thing we can do is look forward. Living in the past helps nobody. If most of the previous years sucked then you shouldn't have much problem making this one better than the others. Try to pull that off each year.

[Werefrog]

why can't teens just practice self control? Whats so bad with that?

It's not that they can't. It's just they won't. Kids are kids, and kids are bound to do not-so-smart things in the heat of the moment. Kids become adults by learning from the mistakes they make as kids.

Well, speaking anatomically, teens' prefrontal cortex is still developing. This is a part of the brain attributed to judgment and self-control. I'm not saying that teens shouldn't be allowed to make choices or be held accountable for those choices but maybe to have a bit more compassion for those teenagers who make a really stupid mistake.

Anyway, I'm sure some people will say that they were perfectly capable of making logical decisions when they were teens. Well, most likely you were exceptional.

[meg]

I'm glad you made that last post. A previous one seemed to imply that you feel frustrated that you didn't get boned a lot as a teen. lol

Seriously. The only thing we can do is look forward. Living in the past helps nobody. If most of the previous years sucked then you shouldn't have much problem making this one better than the others. Try to pull that off each year.

lulz. i was a late bloomer in a lot of ways--i didn't even want sex until i was 17. but i craved the freedom to make mistakes. my friends were allowed that, and they have some of the best, most hilarious stories (without their lives spiraling into doom and gloom). things worth remembering.

and yeah, i'm doing my best. last year can only be described by "i pissed off an old gypsy woman."

this year is so much better.

[phyco126]

A few things; being an adult does NOT mean you are suddenly smart and capable of acting mature when you need to be. Take my ex for instance, despite our school forcing students of all beliefs (unless otherwise excused by a parent) to take a sex ed class that focused on abstinence but also taught safe sex practices, she sure was dumb about it. Even after I tried explaining things to her, she just didn't comprehend that sleeping with a guy can get you pregnent if he does the pull out method, and that sure as heck wouldn't protect you from STDs.

Now as a teenager, I showed a great amount of self-control for some things, but not for others. For instance, I would probably have boned the first girl that opened her legs for me instead of thinking it through. I would jump off the top of a fridge because it seemed safe enough (true story). Yet even when offered drugs on several occasions, I turned it down. I just didn't think it was necessary. Even under the peer pressure of it all, I had no problem turning it down. Personally, I think that teens have the ability to use judgement, but at a grossly different scale than what adults are capable of.

[Aaron]

It's not that they can't. It's just they won't.

So does that mean we should take away someone's freedom to fail?

@Meg
I guess that comes down to your personal belief system. I for one have a very black and white view of morality and ethics. It's either good or bad...not both.

@Werefrog
So, does that mean because their bodies are still developing that they shouldn't be held accountable? I think that is a lame excuse considering the vast majority of people do not go down the roads we're talking about.

[Werefrog]

@Werefrog
So, does that mean because their bodies are still developing that they shouldn't be held accountable? I think that is a lame excuse considering the vast majority of people do not go down the roads we're talking about.

Come on, man. I wrote the answer to that in my original post.

[Aaron]

oh my bad. Then what do you think should be done?

[ilovemyguitar]

Aaron, I'm curious. How old are you?

[Benevolent_Ghaleon]

I'm glad you made that last post. A previous one seemed to imply that you feel frustrated that you didn't get boned a lot as a teen. lol

Seriously. The only thing we can do is look forward. Living in the past helps nobody. If most of the previous years sucked then you shouldn't have much problem making this one better than the others. Try to pull that off each year.

last year can only be described by "i pissed off an old gypsy woman."

this year is so much better.

PLEASE elaborate.

[Werefrog]

Was it like the movie Drag Me to Hell? Because if it is, please do not elaborate as I have not seen that movie yet. Or at least put a spoiler alert in.

[Benevolent_Ghaleon]

Was it like the movie Drag Me to Hell? Because if it is, please do not elaborate as I have not seen that movie yet. Or at least put a spoiler alert in.

The previews for it left me not caring to see it at all.

[Jenner]

I'm glad you made that last post. A previous one seemed to imply that you feel frustrated that you didn't get boned a lot as a teen. lol

Seriously. The only thing we can do is look forward. Living in the past helps nobody. If most of the previous years sucked then you shouldn't have much problem making this one better than the others. Try to pull that off each year.

last year can only be described by "i pissed off an old gypsy woman."

this year is so much better.

PLEASE elaborate.

Being the foremost expert on Meg, as I am currently writing her tell-all biography for when she becomes famous. I shall regale you with the Legend of Meagan.

In spring of 1983, in a state we know as Alaska, the Russians recoiled in horror at the sight of the birth of Meg Olson. Her mere entry into this world is what finally ended the Cold War, as the communists, so stricken with terror at her existence, preceded to self-destruct. Meg occupied her infant years investing fantastic devices, like the Mandelbrot Set, which she let some Jew take credit for so she didn't have to deal with the hassle of fame at such a young age. As she grew up, she began a secret tempestuous lesbian romance with Margaret Thatcher. They spend two decades writing sultry lust-riddled letters to each other. Letters she still carries on her person this day. In 1994 Meg resolved the United States building deficit, then got bored and let it crumble again. She then traveled to the future and destroyed all the Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq, which is why we couldn't locate them. For the past six years Meg has been ghostwriting for Robert Jordan, then assassinated him herself when she read how he was going to end his series. In 1999 she killed Zombie Hitler and foiled his plan to release the Y2K virus, she joined the underground railroad and fought the secret robot war, killing the president of the lizard people who secretly ruled our government, putting it in the hands of the republicans again. (She regrets her choice to this day.) She graduated from High School in 2001 and went to fancy art college, so she could spend 4 years under achieving for once. Present day Meg balances her days out by eating Chuck Norris for breakfast and then shitting him back out again around noon. On Monday, she spends all day writing up how the stock market is going to roll all week. On Tuesday, she teaches Lance Armstrong how to ride bicycles and has peace talks with the alien civilizations science won't tell us about because they only trust her with the knowledge. She leads a secret double-life as a cross dressing stripper named Enrique and goes clubbing every Wednesday night with Soterious Johnson. Her husband begs her to stay home but she CANNOT LET HER FANS SUFFER, THEY CANNOT GO ON WITHOUT HER. On Thursday, she goes down to Vegas and shakes down all the prostitutes there for the money they owe her. She then checks in on the casinos and collects the protection money they're paying her. She blows all that money on sushi. Every Friday night, she rides into the sunset on her rainbow-powered unicorn to fight crime in the future all weekend before coming home on monday to repeat the process of the week.

[Nobiyuki77]

It's not that they can't. It's just they won't.

So does that mean we should take away someone's freedom to fail?

Read my post, I was implying the opposite of that.

Kids become adults by learning from the mistakes they make as kids.

Also, the more your ban something from a kid's life, the more they want to try it for themselves. See smoking, alcohol, drugs, and sex.

Translation: It's better to let them make some mistakes as that will make them better adults (in theory). So long as you properly educate them about the consequences, the decision should be theirs to make. I also said that if you do everything you can to ban something, they're going to want to do it more, so putting a leash on your kid (metaphorically obviously) is a VERY bad idea.

[Aaron]

Aaron, I'm curious. How old are you?

Guess...I love games

[ilovemyguitar]

Aaron, I'm curious. How old are you?

Guess...I love games

74?

(I'm terrible at guessing ages.)


Edit: Seriously, though, could I get a ballpark figure? Are you in middle school? High school? College age? Post-college age?

[Aaron]

College aged